Chicken Crossing
Why did the chicken cross the road? BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change. The chicken wanted change. JOHN McCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road. HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But, this really isn't about me. GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or the terrorists' side of the road. GEORGE A. BUSH: I don't know why a chicken would even try to cross the road in my district, with all that traffic. Unless it wants to become feathered roadkill. ROB BRADLEY: Why did that chicken get to cross the road? I never got a chance to vote for any other chicken to cross the road. CHRISTY FITZGERALD: To cross district lines and pick up enough votes to overcome the fact that voters in its own district don't like the chicken. DURWOOD SMITH: I don't know why the chicken is going to cross the road, but I'll be waiting for it on the other side to get its signature. HARRY SHORSTEIN: Why the chicken chose to jaywalk isn't as important as the fact that the chicken is an elected official and, therefore, will not be effectively prosecuted for its crime. FRITZ BEHRING: We have a duty to provide its safe passage in an efficient, professional manner, if enough chickens want their government to provide that service. MIKE PRICE: After careful analysis, it is my opinion both statistics and logic dictate, should the BCC choose to provide chickens with safe road crossings, that restricting them to less than 33-degree variation from a straight line during the crossing would be most cost-efficient and least interruption to traffic flow. CHEREESE STEWART: The chicken may have crossed the road as part of its territorial or mating instincts. I can tell ya all about chickens. DOUG CONKEY: The chicken crossed the road because all the fine men and women of the military protected its right to cross the road. CAROL STUDDARD: It just breaks my heart that we're not able to afford bus service for these young chickens to cross the road. CHARLES VANZANT: If the chicken's busy somewhere else, it's OK to appoint the rooster to cross the road, isn't it? CAROL VALLENCOURT: Let me tell you, I've been here a long time, and I've seen a lot of chickens cross the road ... DAVID OWENS: I tried my best to teach that chicken to not cross roads. If it decided to try to cross the road, it was because that chicken's parents didn't do their jobs back at the roost and the Legislature didn't give me enough money to teach 'em right. Michael S. Mann Related: Report Abuse | OneMann's blog | login or register to post comments | printer friendly version | Tags: Just for fun
Submitted by pioneer on Thu, 05/22/2008 - 8:45am.
Mike, What a great way to start the day---with laughter! Submitted by SoloVoce on Thu, 05/22/2008 - 9:04am.
Mike, As the duly elected representative of chickens everywhere, I wish to take this opportunity to thank you for highlighting a little known, yet life threatening, & therefore, important topic to chickens everywhere. Should you at any time wish to run for public office again, rest assured that you will have the full & enthusiastic support of all of chickendom. Rabbett! Mike, great one. Just keep the hits rolling in. JATFUR. RichK
Submitted by maridock on Thu, 05/22/2008 - 5:54pm.
Hello Michael Mann, I too received this via e-mail from a friend, what a good chuckle and gives us all something to think about as in: What is your belief about so & so? Depends on who you ask. Thanks for posting for others to get a laugh.
Submitted by OneMann on Fri, 05/23/2008 - 7:01am.
The folks who run minor league baseball teams are some of the most inventive promotional minds in the country. Hence the St. Paul Saints variation of the bobblehead giveaway. Introducing the bobblefoot. The first 2,500 fans at the Saints' May 25 home game will receive a bobblefoot. It's a small likeness of a bathroom stall. The door's closed, but underneath you can clearly see a pair of shoes and pants dropped down around the ankles. Shake it, and one of the feet begins to tap. Larry Craig Night at the ballpark. Won't find that kind of fun in the major leagues. Michael S. Mann michaelsmann@comcast.net People are talking about ...Here are the recent blog postings with the most comments. |
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You're killing me! My lovely bride always thought I was crazy, now she knows it for sure.
Rolling on the floor laughing.
What a delightful way to cap off nine holes of golf.
All this time I thought it was to prove to the Armadillo that it could be done.
Mike Heemer