When I received an email earlier in the week from Lisa the Mother of two of the children killed on the 19th of Feb 2007 it was like slamming on the brakes of a car that is out of control. Life goes on, yes it does but it makes issues like County Goverment and who is hiding behind what and who just can't seem to hold a civil tounge in their heads pretty lame in comparison.
Thank you for the wake up email Lisa.
I believe Lisa has some very solid questions about what did or didn't take place that horrible day and events since. From the news releases that I have been able to go back through it really does appear to me that the focus was more on the tragedy for the local family then it was for an "out of state" family. Not once have I seen or heard anymore then a token acknowledgment of remorse from Elmer Polite or Sherolyn Brandt for the other two children killed that day. I can only "think" what I would do in that situation of course but as a Mother I cannot imagine reaching out to a woman who shares her pain. If you remember Lisa was almost killed as well so she really wasn't in a position to reach out, she was fighting for her very life. It is also very interesting to note that the family of Victoria Brandt has set up a "foundation" www.VictoriasWish.org [1] that doesn't particuarly impress me and I will leave it at that. I encourage you all to visit the site to make your own determination. Let me just say that websites and designs cost money and there is a $1500 fine that hasn't received a penny of payment as of the other day when Lisa last looked.
I'm not saying that I think Elmer Polite willfully did anything nor that he should hang from a rope nor necessarily charged with vehicular manslaughter. What I do believe is that there are some unanswered questions in my mind, and they are as follows.
1. The investigation did not include determing the rate of speed EP was traveling, why is that? How could they determine speeding which is against the law was not a factor if they (FHP) never made the determination of speed?
2. There was a witness who saw EP not merely cross the lane but actually make a sharp swerve. One would think that would be a reason to investigate my first concern of speed.
3. No breathalizer test was given, why? Is smelling a persons breath considered an across the board reliable investigative tool ,it would be an inconsistent one. It can only be as accurate as one individual nose that may or may not be "sensetive" enough to detect anything.
Lisa says she was told there was not enough "probably cause" to do so. My God is three demolished vehicles, three dead kids, and a bad driving record not probable cause?
The news reports quoted an FHP Officer who said the scene was "chaotic", is it possible in the horror of the situation something was just missed or not done? It is so hard to fathom that with what facts are in evidence that he was not charged with something more, or has not had his license suspended for non payment of that fine.
In order to truly heal as much as is possible when there is no closure, is impossible. I think that's what Lisa is searching for in the larger picture. If she doesn't do everything she can to find answers where there should be answers, regardless of what those answers are she cannot truly move forward.
There are a great many issues discussed on these blogs and this is the only issue where I feel I have any true expertise, grief, loss and what it takes to come through that on the other side a whole individual.
This isn't a woman just crying out in grief, it's a woman with some legitimate questions and they need answers. I hope all of you will continue to participate in doing what you can to help. Just telling someone you're sorry and go get counseling is one of the worst things someone in that situation can hear. She needs our encouragement to stay the course of her journey for answers. This next Tuesday will be a horrible horrible day for her, and I think the continued emotional support you can give is far more important then the CCAC or the 5/2 plan or any false rumors on a myriad of topics.
This has been my reality check for the last week.