DIARY OF A HOUSEWIFE

Ah! The beautiful fall is here! This is the time to buy those smelly cinnamon brooms (that will make my allergic hubby sneeze until his nose rolls down in the carpet) and time to decorate the apartment in hearth colors.

That is if I can ever put my little creatures to sleep, of course, which is not happening any time soon. I talked to Peter (my better half) about getting at least a part time job to help him out with the bills. He just turned around and looked at me like if I had just lost my mind: "Oh yeah? And what exactly are you planning to do with the kids? Wearing them like a hat while you work?" And then he went on and on about how much we would have to pay in child care for three kids.

I guess he is got a point. However, I think I can make something here at home and then sell it so I can have a little income of my own. I remember my mom used to make dolls with some kind of dough, that's it! Papier Mache or something like that.

I called mom, she gave me the recipes for the dough and said: "Are you going to be able to do this with the kids jumping all over you honey?"

"Sure! A piece of cake!" I said

11 a.m

And so here I am, pushing one of those "God Bless" little shopping cars for kids in a little truck shape. Now I understand why my arms look like a wrestler, these things are so heavy! Shopping has not been a pleasure for a long time in my life! While I am trying to figure out what kind of flour I should get, my four year old just told me that the two year old is eating a lettuce that she grabbed from another shopping car next to us.

"She is really hungry isn't she?" The old lady said looking at me as if I was some kind of insect.

2 p. m.

I had finally got all my ingredients together on top of the kitchen table ad I have the kids watching TV. Oh Alleluia! This is going to work! and when I sell my first dolls I will pay the light bill and give the paid receipt to Peter while I scream: "Who is the man now, ah? who is the man!"

2.30 p. m.

Mommy! I want bread! Is the third time that I have to stop to give some of the other bread to my 4 year old after feeding him a snack.

No mommy! I want that bread!

I try to explain to him that the bread on top o the table is for the dolls.

Don't be silly mommy dolls don't eat bread!

3.20 p. m.

After I laid my 2 year old down for a nap, (the baby is sleeping too) I go back to the table and found my 4 year old (Devon), spreading my bread with peanut butter and jelly. I guess he can not understand any other use for the bread but being eaten by humans.

4.15 p. m

I am finally forming y first doll My 2 year old (Tommy) just woke up and he is all over me to feel reassurance, I guess. The baby ate and went back to sleep and Devon has the T.V. so loud that I feel my head pounding so hard! I think my eyes will pop out any minute and roll on the carpet.

5.30 P.M.

Oh no dinner! Peter will be here in 30 minutes and he'll divorce me for sure if I don't feed him. Spaghetti night! God bless Italian!

6.00 p m

Look mommy! Tommy just decorated the dog with a spaghetti wig, Devon is dancing frenetically in front of the T.V. and the baby woke up crying. My kitchen looks like a disaster area and the phone is ringing. Would someone shoot me please?

That was Peter "What is going on over there! Are we having party? I'll be there in a few minutes".

"Whatever!" I said hanging up the phone. Sometimes I wonder how he would manage for one day only by himself with the kids. I bet he would have to be Baker Act.

7 p m

Oh magic! Peter got home and we ate dinner. The kids were tired, I guess, because they felt asleep, all of them except for Tommy who still "going and going and going". Lord have mercy! If I would have all that energy I would be a millionaire!

After cleaning the kitchen and battle with Tommy to put him to sleep, I came back to my dolls, only to discover that Peter had stick my creations in the garbage disposer thinking they were some of malformed cakes created to entertain the kids. Nice!

Is someone trying to tell me something from up there? I guess so!